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1.
You make me feel an emptiness I never knew was there And that's fine by me It was harder just to diagnose than it will be to cure This malady Of memory You've got this funny way of stopping summer from ceasing These nights alone with you burn on and on, fighting off the imminent, approaching dawn But summer soon will burn the leaves For autumn must come soon And us: consume But then again... I know that it's been said before, but I feel it bears repeating If only just for me A mournful task it is to sombre break old ties But we do it readily "Sensibly" You've got this funny way of stopping summer from ceasing These nights alone with you burn on and on, fighting off the imminent, approaching dawn But summer soon will burn the leaves For autumn must come soon And us: consume But then again... But then again... But then again.
2.
Aware 03:34
Sunlight blinds the sleepless, the same as moonlights guides them Open eyes oft fail to see, that which was once dreamed But seeing clear, reality, makes footfall more determined So burning eyes lead us frantically to where we're meant to be I'm becoming so aware. As I breathe in this oceanic air to find that I Can journey to sights: far beyond my view and making it through... making it through The day is warm but overcast, the heat felt hides its face The pain behind this broken glass, though refracted still reflects Apprehension to believe, that the grass on this side is truly green But for joy, what must be done? Kill the lights, seek the sun I'm becoming so aware. As I breathe in this oceanic air to find that I Can journey to sights: far beyond my view and making it through... making it through These four walls provide some comfort A lukewarm sense of control But there is greater warmth to be found in a distant coast I'll wade out to see I'm becoming so aware. As I breathe in this oceanic air to find that I Can journey to sights: far beyond my view I've made it through.
3.
This gilded cage is mostly comfortable to me, It's now become my home. But its gleam isn't what it used to be, at all, I feel that I should have known. That this vapid gift of "security", has thrown my frame to atrophy. Now the screams of insecurity, they swell, the closer I get to free But as I slowly turn brittle, patinaed key, my legs fear the imminent release. While here removed from reality, I've been able to feel such blissful peace. The sight of shattered glass is most unbearable to me, desperation led a fool inside With bloody fists and vacant gaze it's clear to see, his inability to fight the tide The angry undertow has long since drawn him in, to fear, things that are and aren't there Treading salt water now with patience running thin, his lungs are filled half water, half air But as he slowly turns his face away from me, his story echoes true behind my eyes His barely twilit reality, makes too clear, what I've long ago surmised But as this world turns, its spin is hastening, this ghost and I return to fuse again And if this is truly reality, I pray the fairytale begin
4.
We never said goodbye. Being born into darkness, you rushed toward the light. I never saw you cry. If I had, I'd have held you and your demons would take flight. And I never knew, just the hell that each day you were going through inside your brain So please refrain, from diving too deep in your thoughts all alone (alone) I should have seen it in your eyes. Silent stares can scream out more than sentences, and never will lie. It's clear to see now, that night - I was never meant to leave, and to join the crowd that left you anxious. I was meant to take your hand and be your guide, to help you escape this lifeless feeling. It's hard to stay up on your feet when life has left you reeling. How did I miss the weight in your embrace? I should have known it wasn't just the time or place. No, it was you. Like smoke passing through outstretched fingers, I didn't understand just what your absence meant, and the pain that lingered that my eyes couldn't see. I thought you'd live on forever, with branch of olive tree But from that future you have strayed, and left me all alone without the chance to say...

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released July 18, 2015

RIP Mack and Mike

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Costly Freefall Salt Lake City, Utah

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